|This skit must be performed in a deep buisiness guy voice while hopping on one foot|
|That guy:||“Well people, we have to get started on these agendas, Walker, how about you start us of with your report.”|
|Walker:||“Alright. So as you can see, our quarterly data shows an increasing trend of product sales in low income areas over the past five to eight weeks, Johnson, care to explain this trend?”|
|Johnson:||“Okay, so, we have been doing a series of surveys in these areas to assess the appeal of certain member’s benefits and coupon discounts. Rockwell, put up the survey data.”|
|Rockwell:||“Mmk, so looking at this, you can understand that the most appealing deals are as follows; thirty percent off laundry detergent every weekday, fifty percent off all meats on Tuesdays, we call that meaty Tuesday, mmk? Also, with a paid membership of twelve dollars a month you will get fifteen percent off all items in the grocery section, ten percent off all electronics, and five percent off all clothing and pharmaceuticals, mmk? Harper, please come up to talk about the positive change that these deals have brought to our fiscal reports, hur hur.”|
|Harper:||“‘Right, so as of last week, our profits have gained a slope of three percent, that’s pretty decent considering it’s a low income area, ‘right? So this rate has grossed us approximately five hundred thousand across the board if you include the high income areas too, ‘right? So after a few weeks, we should be back up to capacity in terms of that product placement overhaul that we have had to put off for a few months. ‘Right? Back to you boss.”|
|That guy:||“Well, I think we can all agree that this is good news for buisenesscorperateindustryconglomeratemonopolyassociationtech.”|
Hopefully you can enjoy the various talents I have to offer.